Photo by Vladimir Yelizarov on Unsplash
In the month of Love, you may start to look at your love life, or lack thereof.
If you get men approaching you in the amount of a football stadium or you get the amount of men that can barely fit an uber. It could because you aren't their type or it could be that RBF made them run in the other direction. It could be that your loudness or crassness could be heard a mile away and he is like ummm no. I will give you some tips on how you can be approached more by men. I don't have it all but I have helped others gain attention from men. This is what I do.
Look the part. If you look your best and feel good, the energy you put out there will positively come back to you in a form of a guy. They like seeing a woman that knows how to clean up nicely. Especially to see if he can show you around his people. So make sure you don't go out anywhere looking crusty. Please do not. Wear nice fitting, comfortable clothing for your body type/style. You can look sexy and feminine in sweats. It doesn't have to be girly all the time. Wear makeup to your liking that makes you look nice, natural is best. Glam is for events that require it. Have your hair look like its clean and styled nicely. No busted lace fronts, relaxed hair that looks greasy, natural hair that looks off, or braids that should've been taken out three months ago.
Know how to act in certain places. If you are at a basketball game, you can get loud because its normal. But not at a church, or a nice restaurant yelling at the waiter. Sometimes too much can be too much. If you don't know how to carry yourself in certain places, guys will look at you as if you have no home training/class. That you will embarrass him, so he won't approach you at all. Unless he is that kind of guy too. Chill out, read the room and act accordingly. Trust me they are watching you to figure who you are. Also to see if you are worth it to even come up to.
Don't Try too hard to get his attention. What I mean is don't be extra when you are around men or the one you are interested in. Like being too loud talking to your friends to get his attention. " Lisa, you know I'm SINGLE RIGHT?" " ughhh I REALLY NEED A TALL, FINE MAN, WHO WEARS NIKE SWEATS AND HAS A DURAG." In this case he has those items I mentioned. Or even touching him a lot and gawking over him. Even acting like you can't do certain things because you want to seem more feminine than you are. I'll give an example. So I was at a game night for my club and this one girl and her friend came in like they were going somewhere that is not a game night. Full face of makeup, (pink lipstick) and you could tell they had a plan coming in. So as they sat near me and my friend as we were playing a board game, they were looking at this very attractive guy who a lot of girls wanted. He was playing dominoes with his friends. So they walked over to play. Not bad right? So their version seemed like you had to do pushups if you lost. She lost, so she had to do push ups. She was loud so it was like " OMGGGG I CAN'T DO THAT! I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO A PUSHUP!" and she made sure her butt was perked up as she "tried" to do it. It was in a way for him to see her so she positioned herself in front of him. Hopefully you catch my drift. See when she did this, he didn't even pay attention to her at all. His eyes were to someone else. The only ones who paid attention was his friends and it was for a second. If it happens, let it happen. Don't try to force his future interaction to you. It will give you a bad look. Also, he will try to definitely play you even more because he knows how much you need for him to want you.
Be friendly, smile a bit. If you look friendly, then they will be more comfortable to come up to you. Sometimes a man will still come up to you just to see (if you have an RBF) if you may be friendly but look like that. And do not roll your eyes when a guy comes to approach you. Bad energy will turn him off and possible suitors around the area. They are looking at you too. To see how you treated the one who came up to you. Also to see if you are are even worth it to walk up to after the other guy came.
Also the conversation you may have. I might have another post on this but basically don't look desperate. Try to get key info out of him casually. Be comfortable and make him feel comfortable. Doing that will have him tell you more information about himself and can possibly make a great connection. Smile at him, give eye contact. The biggest thing Is the eye contact. Don't make him feel that you are annoyed by him, leave a good impression even if you don't want him. Keep all of your attention on him. It will make him feel better, that you are listening to him and care somewhat about him to stay engaged. Flirt a bit. if he mentions something, bring up something to add onto that. MAJOR KEY: feel his vibe and base everything I said to his vibe. He may be super friendly, or monotone/dull, energetic, etc. This is how you can get the most out of any conversation from someone/anyone.
Hopefully this will help you on the way to get more suitors to choose from.
Xoxo Ashley
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